Snape's past
by J. Marguerite
Summary: As the Yule Ball approaches, the Potions Master's secret past slowly unravels in front of Hermione's eyes.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: All these characters, save my character Louisa Lucas, belong to J.K. Rowling. If I did own them, I wouldn't be using FanFiction, now, would I?  
  
  
  
Snape's past.  
  
  
  
By J. Marguerite  
  
  
  
  
  
How he missed her. His heart secretly ached for her, a longing that he had pushed down into the very bottom of his belly, where it hid, but occasionally surfaced to remind him of his past that he had tried so many times to leave behind. But how he loved Louisa, the only one who had shared his pain of being different from everyone else, the only one who had showed compassion to his longing of someone to love him.  
  
Severus Snape, Potions Master at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry glared at his sixth-year Gryffindor/Slytherin class, his coal-black eyes filled with pure hatred. They could be so happy, so joyful, especially with the Yule Ball around the corner. It was once a joyous time for Severus too, though that was long ago, when he was only young.  
  
As the class worked fearfully, though the occasional snicker from a Slytherin when they pulled a minor prank on one of the Gryffindor's Potion, though their teacher ignored it, Severus felt his hand slide over to his cloak pocket. His fingers dug deep, and clasped around the corner of a photo, the photo of someone he had lost long ago. A small shriek as heard from a student, and the photo fell from his grasp. Severus' long, black hair fell in front of his eyes.  
  
"Mister Longbottom, what mess have you gotten yourself into this time?" The Potions Master hissed, standing up. Neville Longbottom quivered with terror, as his enraged teacher stormed over to him. "Another mess you've gotten yourself into, I see", Professor Snape muttered, glancing briefly over at the swirling, grey liquid.  
  
"Sir," Hermione Granger began.  
  
"Why weren't you watching him?" Severus barked, his eyes daring for her to continue. The class was deathly quiet- no one had seen Snape this angry. Not even the taunting Slytherins dared to laugh. "Well?"  
  
Hermione's face fell, her cheeks burning a bright red.  
  
"Thirty points from Gryffindor," Severus hissed softly, turning on his heel. "Class dismissed".  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Hermione walked down the hall, Harry Potter and Ron Weasley on either side of her, shortly after the strange incident in the Dungeons where the Potions Class was held.  
  
"'Mione, what's wrong?" Ron asked, slightly confused at his friend's strange, quiet behavior.  
  
"Snape sure was acting strange today, don't you think?"  
  
Harry shrugged, before replying, "I suppose. Though he's always cruel. But I guess you're right".  
  
Hermione nodded; "He was quiet before that sudden out burst. Almost as if he was thinking about something- you don't think he's back with You-Know- Who again, do you?"  
  
Ron's eyes grew wide, as Harry spoke, "Dumbledore would find out, but you do have a point".  
  
Hermione's brow narrowed, as she thought of a logical reason as to why Snape's behavior was changing ever so slightly- from the cruel, to the bitter cold.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-Eleven-year-old Severus Snape ran down the corridor, his Transfiguration books in his arms. He was late, once more.  
  
  
  
Damn. He thought to himself, gaining speed. Why had he let himself stall? Those damn Gryffindors, Potter and Black, had been picking on him again. Hell to them! He continued to think, slipping around a narrow corner, Hell!  
  
  
  
"Whatcha running for, mysterious stranger?" a young, high-pitched voice asked. Severus looked up, through a curtain of black hair.  
  
"Uh." Severus stalled. Before him stood what seemed to be an angel. A young, fragile looking girl with great, deer-like eyes when shined into car headlights looked up at him. She looked so innocent.  
  
"I'm late for a class. And you will be to, if you don't hurry along" He replied curtly, nodding towards the books she was carrying in her thin, weak-looking arms.  
  
"Hm? Oh! Yes!" She looked down at her books, a faint blush crossing her ghost-like cheeks-  
  
Ghost-like. The Potions Master snapped back into reality. Was Louisa a ghost? The first time he had met her, that day he had been running late to his Transfiguration Class, as had she, was that she would love to be a ghost after she had died. So that she could live forever. Severus has laughed at her, saying that he would rather be dead, and stay dead. She had looked at him strangely, as if he was out of his mind, but had left it at that.  
  
He felt himself drifting off into memories once more, and busied himself by marking a pile of essays, his sixth-year Hufflepuff class had written. After three word after word, useless essays, he started randomly marking them, not reading over them. He sighed as he gave the last essay a "B", and pushed out of his desk, looking at the empty classroom. He sighed, and pulled out the moving photo of his former best friend out of his pocket. He shook his head sadly. What had he done to lose her? She wasn't sensitive, or at least he was sure she wasn't.  
  
'I wonder what she'd be doing if she was still alive' he thought, biting his thumbnail, 'working for the Ministry of Magic? Teaching? Be a mother?'  
  
The last thought stayed in his mind. He would have loved to be the father of her child.  
  
'No!' He thought to himself. Why was he still thinking that? She was gone! Gone! Like he said Twenty-something years ago, when you're dead, you're dead. Period. He groaned, walking over to his private office, which lead into his bedroom.  
  
"I should get some sleep" he muttered, pulling his teaching robes off, and slipping on his pajamas. He pulled down the sheets on his bed slowly. He ran his hand over the silk sheets, and fell into them, letting himself be engulfed in darkness.  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
A/N: Short Chapter, I know, but what do you think? Press the button below. You know you want to. 


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: None, except Louisa Lucas, are my characters. I just like to play with J.K.'s World, and make them do things, which never would have happened otherwise.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hermione Granger tossed and turned, as the world outside her bedposts slept soundly. Not even Mrs. Norris crept around the Hogwarts corridors, searching for students who were out after hours. Hermione let out an exhausted sigh, as she gave up trying to sleep. She sat up slowly, her dark, chocolate-brown eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness that surrounded her. A soft breeze whistled through the cracks of the Hogwarts walls, as the sixteen-year-olds mind drifted off. Hermione lent back against her bed head, her bushy brown hair resting on her shoulders. Her thoughts circled around her mind, but one stayed clear.  
  
'Snape', she thought, 'He was acting so strange today?' Hermione sighed once more, and closed her eyes. Now wasn't the time to think of people. People like him. She shut her eyes, as a wave of exhaustion overpowered her, and drew into a deep sleep.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
As the sun rose for a new day, the Potions Master awoke, his sheets twisted around his legs. He groaned into his pillow, and pulled himself off the bed.  
  
'What day is it?' he thought, as he slipped off his pajamas, and into his Teaching Robes. 'Ah, yes. Thursday.' Severus paused as he glanced in the only mirror in his entire room. He looked awful- His eyes were a blotchy red, with tear-streaked marks down his cheeks. Had he been crying in his sleep? No, that was ridiculous. He didn't cry. But. Severus shook his head, and ran his long, thin fingers through his long hair, in a vague attempt to brush it. He rubbed his eyes and broke his gaze from the mirror, and stooped to gather his things in which he needed for his lessons in which he had to teach that day. He picked them up, and carried them out to the classroom, and left them on his desk, as he exited, his black robes sweeping along the floor.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Harry Potter glanced over at one of his best friends, Hermione.  
  
"You all right, Hermione?" he asked. She has been particularly quiet that morning.  
  
"Hm? Oh, yes, Harry, I'm fine" she grinned unconvincingly, and turned back to her toast. Harry looked over at Ron, his green eyes filled with curiosity. Ron shrugged, in a 'Don't worry about her- probably just on the rag' way. Harry raised an eyebrow, and stifled a laugh. Hermione's eyes slid over to them, but quickly shifted back to her breakfast.  
  
The door of the Great Hall opened, and Severus Snape walked in slowly, and headed over to the Teacher's Table. Hermione's head sprung up, as she watched him, her eyes following his every move. She caught Ron's wide-eye, and let her head flop back to the table. Ron kicked Harry under the table, and motioned over at their female friend.  
  
"I'm fine." Hermione muttered after a sip of her juice.  
  
  
  
***  
  
That blasted Gryffindor girl had been looking at him. He wasn't some statue to be goggled at! With a twisted scowl on his face, Severus sat down at the end of the table, next to Minerva McGonagall.  
  
"Yule Ball is coming up, Severus. Any plans?" she asked politely, brushing a few crumbs from her face.  
  
"No," he growled back. 'The anniversary of Louisa's death is coming up too', he thought to himself.  
  
"I do wish you would cheer up- it's a lovely time of year!" Minerva continued. A silent sigh came from Severus, as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the noisy chatter the surrounded him.  
  
-Louisa sat down in front of the burning fire, in the Slytherin Common Room. It was snowing frantically outside, and the Herbology Lesson had been canceled. Sparks crackled, as the young Severus sat down beside his friend. Where was Lucius? Oh, yes, he had told Severus that he wouldn't want to be seen with him, while he was hanging around with Louisa- he had said that she was "Not one of them". Severus grinned over at Louisa, as the fire reflected off her pale face, creating an almost eerie, yet. gorgeous, he decided, glow. Louisa turned to him, her light-brown hair flicking over her shoulder. As Severus searched for something to say, Louisa's arms were wrapped around his neck in a tight hug.  
  
"Louisa?" he started, his eyes growing wide,  
  
"Shh." she replied, her voice, as always, soft. Severus could feel her lips brushing against his neck as she spoke. Whether she knew, he didn't know, but it tickled the fires in his belly with so much emotion, he wondered if it was against the law-  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
A/N: Thanks to the very few people who reviewed. But I appreciate all feedback! I hope you like this chapter. My stepbrother was looking over my shoulder as I was typing, so it's probably not the best of my work. But I hope you like it, anyway! Please review!! 


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Do people seriously think a teenage girl owns Harry Potter? Um. alrighty, then.  
  
A/N: Wow! People actually like this story! Heh. I ish so proud. And in answer to a question I received, to make it was frank as possible, 'No, Hermione is not Louisa'. But hey, I have a twisted mind. The answer may change.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hermione Granger entered her first class of the day- History of Magic, Harry and Ron not too far behind. Professor Binns floated in, as the Trio sat down, and pulled out their quills, ready for possibly the most boring lesson of the day. Even Hermione felt herself beginning to daydream as their ghostly professor started to drone on about the ancient Eurasian witches and wizards. She quickly scribbled down some important names that they had to know, as Professor Binns glided over to his desk, and picked up a piece of parchment.  
  
"Now, if I may have your attention, please," he began, glancing up at his students, who looked so bored, they would have easily handed over their quills for a Potions Lesson. "We will be starting a new topic soon. For this topic, you will need to do a fair bit of research in the Hogwarts Library- Mister Finnigan, please turn this way! Much better, now the topic will be 'Past Hogwarts students'. Please write that down"  
  
Hermione quickly scribbled down the subject, her mind filed with questions. 'Past Hogwarts Students? What did that mean?' Her attention was quickly reverted back to the teacher, as he continued.  
  
'You will be reading up the history, and, if they are still alive, were they are now, and what they are doing. You will be handing this in as a report, and later will write an essay in class" he finished, his pale face staring out at his class. He placed the parchment back on his desk. Hermione frowned, as she stared down at the topic, her mind thinking rapidly. Even if she didn't think it was necessary for her to, she decided that she would go and get some back-up information on some past students after the lesson.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Lunch time. Possibly the worst hour of the day, along with breakfast and dinner, Severus thought, sitting down at his usual seat. This was the time where he would have to talk to the other faculty members, and act as if he almost enjoyed what they were saying. It used to be tolerable before, but now, with the Yule Ball less then a week away, it was at the top of the list of the chat topic. And, just as he had expected, the topic quickly changed from the latest Qudditch game- Ravenclaw versus Hufflepuff- to what decorations should be put up around the Great Hall- whether they should be Christmas colors, red and green, or shimmering silver and gold. Personally, Severus didn't really care, as long as he didn't have to attend. Yet, being a teacher, he would have to, whether he wanted to or not. Albus Dumbledore turned to him.  
  
'Please don't ask me,' he thought, 'Not me, you annoying-'  
  
"What do you think, Severus? Red and green, or silver and gold?"  
  
Severus pretended to think about it, before replying. "What about blue and white?" he answered. 'Blue and white? Where did that come from?' He thought, frowning inwardly. Albus raised his eyebrows, and turned to the rest of the staff. They spoke briefly about Severus' opinion, and quickly returned to the prior conversation. Severus fingers clung around his fork, as he took a quick bite of his pumpkin-and-steak pie. Blue and white- that was the color of the robes Louisa wore for their very first Yule Ball. She looked very elegant, especially with her hair twisted into a French Roll. He invited her of course, yet he could tell Lucius wasn't pleased. 'That bastard,' he thought, his knuckles turning white, 'What did he have against Louisa?'  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Hermione jumped up from her seat at the Gryffindor.  
  
"'Mione, whatcha doin'?" Ron asked, his mouth full of custard pie.  
  
"I'm going to the library. I have to get some research done," she muttered quickly, gathering her things.  
  
"On what?"  
  
"Our new History of Magic topic- Past Hogwarts students"  
  
Ron gaped at her. "Hermione, we haven't even started that yet!"  
  
"All the reason for me to get started!" she said, and dashed off.  
  
Ron shook his head as he watched her speed off.  
  
  
  
***  
  
Hermione walked slowly down the History side of the Hogwarts Library, her fingers running along the dusty covers of the books.  
  
"History of famous wizards. Witches and wizards if the eighteen hundreds." she muttered, as Madam Pince quickly strolled down to meet her.  
  
"Good afternoon, Miss Granger. What brings you here today?" she asked politely, nodding her head in a welcome.  
  
"We're starting a new topic in History of Magic- Past Hogwarts students- and I was just trying to do some research" Madame Pince, nodding.  
  
"Why don't you try looking at the old annuals? Maybe they can help. They're right over there!" the librarian pointed over to a dusty corner of the library, where a stack of black, hardback books. Hermione nodded, and quickly skipped over.  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus Snape ran a hand through his thick, fairly greasy hair, as he sat at his personal desk in his office. Louisa was always very picky about is appearance. She always made sure he was neatly dressed, with his long hair tied back in a short, fairly girlish looking ponytail. She even once walked on him dressing into his school robes. He was horrified- him standing there, beside his bed in nothing but a pair of dark green boxers. Louisa hadn't said anything, but pulled out her hairbrush, kneeled on his bed, began to brush his hair, and gave him a small speech about good hair care. Even though he was twelve at the time, Severus had to admit it was; well, almost erotic. He smiled at the memory, as a shiver ran down his spine. His fingers drummed on the wooden desk, as a dreamy look crossed his dark eyes. He quickly jumped out of the chair, and walked over to his bed. His head quickly hit the pillow, and closed his eyes, another memory crossing his mind, though one that wasn't fond.  
  
'Lucius glared at his friend.  
  
"For the sake of Merlin, Severus, why do you hang around with that girl?"  
  
Severus frowned beginning to feel a little embarrassed.  
  
"She's my friend. Why shouldn't I?" he snapped, sticking up for his friend.  
  
"But she's not a pure witch- did you know her father was a mudblood?"  
  
"Don't you dare call her that!" Severus growled, rage overcoming his embarrassment.  
  
"Oh, please Severus, you and I both know that one day she'll turn into a mublood-loving girl, just like Gryffindors"  
  
Severus frowned. Even if she was a half-caste- or mudblood was Lucius had called her- she was still his friend. Perhaps even loved her-  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Thanks to every who reviewed! I now have a total of six reviews! Ha- ha! Well, thanks again! Hope you like this chapter! And please press the button below, and review! Spanks! 


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Yeah, I own Harry Potter. When I'm asleep in bed, dreaming about me being queen of the world.  
  
A/N: Well, in answer to SilverWolf's question, that may come up later in the story. Or it may not. Though, if anyone else is wondering, I promise you a hint may come in this chapter. And Slytherin Girl- well; just keep reading *hint, hint*.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hermione groaned as the lunch bell rang. 'Potions already?' she thought, shutting the 1984 Hogwarts Annual. She picked up the book, and replaced it back in its rightful spot. She had found many, well, boring people. 'Though, Harry's parents had been in there', she thought 'along with Lupin, and Sirius- oh, and Lucius and Snape!' Hermione shook her head, as she felt a wave of girlish giggles coming on. She quickly dashed upstairs to the Gryffindor Common Room, and grabbed her Potions equipment. As she ran back downstairs, her book bag bulging, the bell rang once again, symbolizing the beginning of the lesson. 'Oh, no! Snape's going to be berserk!' she thought, fretfully. As she spun around the corner, before running down the stairs to the dungeons, a thought crossed her mind. There was a girl in one of the photos with Snape. Her name was at the bottom of the photo. What was it again? Louise, or Louisa? Oh well, it didn't matter this very moment. Hermione jumped down the last few steps, before bursting into the Potions Classroom.  
  
"Ah, Miss Granger, I'm so glad you can grace us with your presence" the Potions Master sneered, as the rest of the class looked over at her.  
  
Hermione bit her lip, before trying to explain, "I'm sorry, Professor, but I was in the library-"  
  
"Why am I'm not surprised?"  
  
"-And I got sidetracked!" Hermione felt a small trickle of blood, as she cut through the skin of her lip.  
  
"Miss Granger, you do realize that class begins right after lunch, no?"  
  
"Yes, sir, I do," She replied, nodding.  
  
"And it has been for the past six years?"  
  
"Yes, sir," she repeated, nodding once more. Snape frowned, and pointed to an empty desk, before returning to his own.  
  
"I'll see you after class, Miss Granger," he muttered, groaning inwardly. Now he would have to spend time after class with that irritable girl. Hermione's thick eyebrows' shot up like as if she had been dunked into a bucket full of ice-cold water- like the lake in wintertime. After class with Snape? 'He needs a good thump!' Hermione thought angrily. He felt the eyes of fellow Gryffindors piercing into the back of her head. Hermione Granger, the goody-goody two-shoes on detention? The thought was laughable, but right now this was no laughing matter. Snape was angry already, for reasons unknown, and not even a Slytherin dared to make a sneering comment.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
After the terrible Potions Lesson, Hermione remained in her desk, her head hanging in shame. She felt Harry and Ron's hands give her a 'good-luck' pat on the back, but she felt no better. She set her cauldron on the ground, and rested her head in her hands as the last of the students filed out of the door.  
  
"Stop acting as if the world has ended, Miss Granger," her teacher muttered, going through a pile of parchment, "It's only for an hour".  
  
'An hour?' Hermione thought, 'In an hour I could learn all One Thousand Advanced Herbs for Joyous Celebration Spells!' She sighed quietly.  
  
"What do I have to do?" she asked, ready for cleaning the desks, or refilling the various jars that surrounded the room.  
  
"Just sit there," Snape continued to mutter, not looking up. A look of curiosity crossed Hermione's face, but shrugged, and looked down at the desktop. From stories she had heard, most of the time the Potions Master usually gave the students hard, laborious jobs, such as scrubbing every desk in the classroom, or pulling up the weeds that grew around the lake. 'What's with him?' She looked up at him, wondering. 'But just sit there? Now that was different'  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
'Bloody Gryffindor girl. What does she expect me to? Jump on top of my desk, and tapdance?'  
  
"Miss Granger, do I have something on my nose?"  
  
Hermione shook her head. "No, sir. I wasn't looking at anything"  
  
'Good. Now keep your bloody eyes shut, your head down, and stop looking! You'd think she was caught in the path of a Bludger' he thought, trying to return to the work his Second year Slytherin class had done. 'That's a funny way to think about it- caught in the path of a Bludger'. Severus gave a mental shrug, and turned back to his papers.  
  
"Professor Snape?" Hermione spoke up.  
  
"What is it?" he asked, refusing to look up.  
  
"It has been an hour,"  
  
"Good. Go." He muttered. There was a sound of papers, as Hermione scrambled out.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
-"Guess what, Louisa!" the Second Year Severus ran into the Slytherin Common Room a grin crossing his face, his crooked teeth shining. Louisa looked up from her History book, her quill playing in her fingers.  
  
"What?" she asked softly.  
  
"I got on the Slytherin Qudditch Team! Seeker!" Louisa's eyes grew wider, if possible, a huge, rare grin crossing her face.  
  
"That's great! When's practice- I want to see you in action!"  
  
Severus stalled, now feeling embarrassed. "Tomorrow. You don't-"  
  
"Good! I can't wait!"  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Louisa sat in the last row of the raised seats, the only person in the entire Qudditch field. She squinted as the Slytherin Qudditch Team got ready to practice.  
  
Severus glanced up at the seats, and spotted Louisa. He mounted his broom, and flew up, as the team got ready to practice. The Quaffles, Bludgers, and the Snitch were released. Severus flew up into the air, trying to make a good impression. There was a faint glow of gold, and Severus off. A gust of wind flew by his face, as a Bludger shot. Severus quickly stopped, and shook his head. 'That was close,' he thought, watching the Bludger fly by. He broke his gaze, and returned back to his goal of catching the Snitch.  
  
"Look out!" Chris Mickson, the Slytherin Captain, cried. Severus stopped in mid-flight, his head spinning around. No Bludges were around him. Who was he calling to? A loud crash was heard, as a Bludger flew through a row of seats. A scream was heard a few seconds later. 'Louisa!' Severus thought, his eyes grew wide as he flew over to the seats where she was previously sitting. A giant hole was only a few yards away.  
  
Severus jumped off his broomstick, and ran the last couple of inches to his friend.  
  
"Are you all right, Louisa?" he asked softly. Louisa nodded, streams over tears falling down her face. As Severus' teammates searched for the rogue Bludger, Severus' arms were thrown his friend, in a silent prayer that she wasn't hurt-  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Woah, long chapter- for me anyway. Probably not the most exciting chapter- I'd be surprised if you stayed awake through it! Anyway, I'm so happy with everyone's reviews! Seriously! If it weren't for you guys, I would be stuck with all these thoughts circling my brain. But because of you, I actually have something to do on my one hour and twenty minute bus ride to school! 


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: Do I really need to put this on every chapter? Oh, well. No, I don't own Harry Potter. But I do own the rights to scratch my ass at my own pleasure.  
  
A/N: Only two reviews? Two! Was my last chapter that bad?! Oh, well. Okay, then.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Now, I hope you have at least picked who you want to research" Hermione's History teacher said, a he floated back and forth in front of the class. Hermione couldn't speak for the rest of the class, but she had- Louisa Lucas. For some peculiar reason, she wanted to research her. Was it because she had died? Perhaps that was why.  
  
The bell rang and Hermione jumped out of her seat. It was the last period of the day, and she wanted to find a little more information on Louisa. All she knew was that she died in her seventh year, and was friends with Snape. 'Who would want to be friends with Snape?' Hermione thought, was she walked down the library, Ron and Harry behind her, talking about the latest Qudditch game- Ravenclaw against Hufflepuff. Ron paused in his chatter, and turned to Hermione.  
  
"'Mione, why are you so obsessed with this dead girl? She was a bloody Slytherin!"  
  
"I don't know- and like you said, she's dead. So it doesn't matter what house she was in anymore" Hermione replied, curtly. Ron rose an eyebrow at his friend's comment, but didn't reply. "Anyway, you really should do some research on your student" Hermione pushed the doors to the library opened, and immediately headed over to the annuals. It really was hard to find any information in them, but considering the students' private records were shut off to anyone, but the staff, there was no other to find any information. The only person, who probably really knew what Louisa was like, was Professor Snape. But she couldn't ask him- he was so cruel. She sighed, and took the annual she had been looking through the previous day to the desk where Harry and Ron were sitting, and flipped through it. There had been a page almost dedicated to her- was it because she had died that year? More then likely, because the teachers wouldn't just make a page to anyone. The sixth-year pulled out her quill, and a piece of parchment, and scrawled down a couple of dates.  
  
'Date of birth: Sixteenth of January, 1967.  
  
Date of death: Twenty-forth of December, 1984'  
  
'Twenty-forth of December? Christmas Eve?' Hermione thought, almost in horror.  
  
"What is, Hermione?" Harry asked, seeing his friend's strange expression.  
  
"Louisa- she died on Christmas Eve. Do you think that is why Snape's been acting so; I don't know; so mean? I mean, from what I've been reading, she was almost like his girlfriend," the thought of their Potions Master having any Romantic feelings for anyone was so humorous, that Hermione had to laugh with her friends.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
As Hermione lay in her bed that night, she knew that she would have to ask her Potions Master about Louisa Lucas. If she was his girlfriend, he would obviously know almost everything about her. It might be difficult, hell; she might even get another detention, but she knew it was the only way that she was to get anywhere with her project.  
  
  
  
On the other side of the castle, Severus Snape lay in his bed, having trouble trying to sleep. During the dinner, he had heard that blasted History of Magic teacher talking to Albus about the latest assignment he had assigned his sixth-year classes- Past Hogwarts Students! Among with other students and their picks, that bloody Granger girl had picked Louisa. She knew she would start to snoop around about his past- Louisa was his past. She wasn't going to get any information out of him. "She can bloody fail that assignment. Ha, that will get her panties up in her knot" Severus snorted, as he rolled onto his side, and forced himself to sleep.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
-"Only a few bumps and scratches, and a sprained wrist" the Hogwarts nurse said, wrapping a bandage around her wrist. Severus put his hand up to his chest, a breathed a sigh of relief. Thank Merlin, she wasn't hurt badly. Louisa whimpered slightly, a fairly large scratch running from her cheek to her eye bleeding slowly. The nurse muttered a healing spell, and the scratch healed quickly. Severus sat down on the edge of her bed, and put her sprained wrist in his lap.  
  
"Are you okay?" he asked softly, glad his teammates weren't in the room. Louisa nodded, a weak smile crossing her face.  
  
"I don't want to be in here," Louisa murmured.  
  
"Don't worry, you'll be able to get out soon," Severus rubbed her injured hand slowly, his fingers curling around hers.  
  
"Where's Lucius?" Louisa asked suddenly, her large eyes staring at him. Severus shrugged.  
  
"I don't really care," he let slip. Even though he was a good friend with Lucius, all he really wanted now was to be alone with Louisa.  
  
Louisa smiled, and moved into a sitting position. "Thanks for being here," she murmured softly.  
  
"You're my friend- why shouldn't I?"  
  
Louisa opened her arms wide, and Severus leapt into them, giving her a warm hug. He wasn't quite sure why, but he gave her a soft kiss on her jaw. Whether it was appropriate at the time, or a way to say 'I love you', Severus felt, and heard, Louisa sighing, her eyes closed in content-  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Well, another short chapter, but my Muse has gone on vacation, because hardly anyone reviewed on my last chapter (hint, hint). But I hope you enjoyed it! And please, please, on Merlin's grave, review! I need to know I'm loved! 


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, so don't sue. All you'll get out of me is a chicken sandwich, a pair of yellow thongs, and a pair of bright pink pajamas.  
  
A/N: Wow, I got a lot of reviews for my last chapter. Woo-hoo! Go me!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
As the sixth year Gryffindor/Slytherin Potions Class filed out, Hermione Granger lingered behind, trying to revise the speech she had thought up earlier that day.  
  
"Miss Granger, class is over," Professor Snape hissed, clearing up his desk. Hermione took a few nervous steps forward, as she smoothed down her robes.  
  
"Professor Snape, may I- I ask you something?" she stuttered, her books heavy in her arms. Butterflies seemed to flutter around in her stomach, as her teacher stared at her, his coal black eyes daring her to continue.  
  
"It really depends on what the subject matter, Miss Granger," he answered, his fingers clasped together. Hermione took a deep breath, and slowly replied, as she stumbled over her speech.  
  
"For History of Magic, Professor Binns assigned us a new project- Past Hogwarts Students- Have you heard of it?"  
  
Snape nodded, his face showing a blank, almost bored, expression.  
  
"And I picked a girl- Louisa Lucas. And I was wondering;" Hermione took a deep breath, before continuing. "I was wondering if you knew her- Be-be- because, I saw in an annual, there was a picture of you with her, and I thought that perhaps-"  
  
"That'll be enough, Miss Granger. If you must know, I did know her-"  
  
"Was she a good friend?" Hermione interrupted.  
  
"Do not interrupt me, girl, if you want me to tell you anything, you must learn to keep your mouth shut!"  
  
Hermione blushed, and looked at the ground. She could feel Snape's eyes drilling holes into her scalp.  
  
"And, as you probably have already guessed, she was my friend. A good friend," The Potions Master stalled. Not for a long time had he spoken about Louisa- even Dumbledore tried to avoid the subject.  
  
"Um, excuse me if I'm becoming to personal, but can you tell me anything about her? Anything at all?"  
  
"It really depends what you want to ask. You should be grateful with anything I let your greedy hands cling around"  
  
Hermione felt her face grow crimson. "Well anything you wouldn't mind telling. There was a picture of her and you, and I believe Lucius Malfoy. Was she good friends with h-"  
  
"No she was not!" The Professor snapped, his eyes narrowing. Shocked, Hermione took a step back, a look of fear on her face. His eyes seemed to shoot bullets into her face, his knuckles going paper white.  
  
"Well, I best be going. Charms, I have Charms," she mumbled, quickly sprinting out of the classroom.  
  
'Good riddance,' Severus thought, glaring at the swinging door. 'Louisa friends with Lucius? She must have been joking!' Yet, another voice spoke up in the back of his mind. 'She didn't know, Severus. Nobody knew'.  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Get anything out of the most friendliest man in the world?" Ron asked his friend, his voice full of mockery, as she sat down next to him in Charms.  
  
"Only that he was friends with her. And apparently she and Lucius weren't the best of friends. And that's it," Hermione told her two friends.  
  
"Well at least you got something- I'm surprised he didn't give you a detention," Harry commented, giving a small shrug.  
  
"It probably crossed his mind, though," Hermione sighed, before picking up her wand, ready to cast an invisibility spell.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
'Thank Merlin tomorrow was Saturday. No lessons, no need for me to step outside of my office, and no bloody Granger girl!' Severus grinned privately, and set down the bundle of work he had been carrying. Yet he still had his thoughts, and his memories. Whether he wanted to have them or not, Severus knew he couldn't erase his past. And he couldn't bring Louisa back.  
  
"Maybe I should have been nicer to bloody Granger," he muttered to himself, as he slipped off his robes. "She was only being her bloody inquisitive self" He opened the door to his bathroom, and turned on the shower, warm water spraying down onto the tiled green floor below. Severus pulled down his boxers, and stepped in, the water flowing down his body slowly.  
  
  
  
-Third-year Severus Snape climbed into his bed, during the Christmas holidays. Rain pattered down on the ground outside. Even though he was in the dungeons, he could hear the rain splattering loudly on the already-wet grass. It seemed very lonely, being alone in his bedroom. He had gotten quite used to having people in his dorm. He sighed to himself, and rolled onto his side. Louisa had stayed with him, during the holidays, though he suspected only from compassion.  
  
A deep rumble echoed through Hogwarts, as lightning exploded outside. He could hear a quick patter of feet from outside the door. The door creaked open, and body jumped into his bed.  
  
"Louisa?" he muttered, sitting up.  
  
"I'm scared of thunder," she whispered. As Severus' eyes adjusted to the dim light, her stared at his friend.  
  
"Aren't you cold?" he asked, seeing his friend in only a tank top and panties. Louisa shook her, and wriggled into his lap.  
  
"No. You make me warm," she whispered into his ear. Another grumble echoed over the Hogwarts grounds, and Louisa's arms were quickly wrapped around he friend's neck.  
  
"Don't worry, you shouldn't be scared. It won't hurt you," Severus muttered. He could feel Louisa's breath on his cheek. 'Was it wrong to be extremely turned on when you're only thirteen?' he thought, as he felt her lips brush against cheek. "Um, maybe we should get some sleep," he said.  
  
"Mmm-hmm. But before we do-" Louisa leant over and kissed Severus gently on the lips. A wave of shock flew through him, before he began to kiss her back, his lips gently caressing hers. His hand slid down her arm, and rested on her thigh. A sigh was emitted from Louisa's lips, as she broke away from his face.  
  
"G'night, Sevvie," she murmured, resting her head in his shoulders.  
  
"Good night Louisa," he murmured, a broad smile crossing his face. -  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: I'm in a bit of a fluffy mood. I'm listening to romantic at the music at the same time, so you get my point. But did you enjoy? I enjoyed typing it! Ha-ha. Anyway, please review, and make my day! I have many big exams coming up, so I need some stress relief! 


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, the stories would be crappy. God bless J.K. Rowling.  
  
A/N: Oh. Only Two Reviews for my Last Chapter. Eh. Well, thanks to the two people who actually were kind enough to review. I appreciate it. My Muse gives me presents.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
As the sun rose for the beginning of the weekend, Severus stretched out his sleepy body. He yawned and slowly sat up, as he rubbed his eyes with the heel of his hand. Severus rolled out of the bed, his bare feet touching the cold floor.  
  
"Bloody winter- why can't winter be warmer?" he muttered, as he walked over to his green, fluffy slippers. He grabbed his bathrobe and tied it around his waist, as he waited for his body to wake up. He definitely wasn't a Morning Person. 'Why couldn't the morning begin in the afternoon?' he thought, quickly changing into his robes.  
  
"I need a coffee" he muttered, giving his eyes another quick rub before struggling out.  
  
  
  
As Hermione Granger slowly got changed into her jeans, her mind slowly going over her thoughts, she really knew she had to get some more information out of Snape. It was almost like getting blood out of a stone yesterday. Even though she knew it was going to be difficult, she had no other choice. She just had to make sure she took the right precautions, and ask her questions carefully. Who knows, maybe she would be able to find out if there was anything romantic about their relationship.  
  
A sudden shiver ran down Hermione's spine as she slid on her sweater, as that thought crossed her mind. 'That was strange,' she thought, as she ran her fingers through her hair. She shrugged the thought away from her mind, and skipped out of her dorm to meet Harry and Ron downstairs.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus slowly sipped his coffee, as he sat at his seat in the Great Hall. The warm liquid filled his body, and a tiny, content smile slid onto his face. Probably one of the best Muggle inventions, it defiantly made the beginning of his day just that bit better. He glanced down at the Daily Prophet that sat before, and pushed it away. He didn't want to read about any bad news- he was actually, for once, in a quite happy mood. Though he couldn't show it. He might get some suspicious looks. Professor Snape happy? That was impossible! He laughed silently, and shook his head, his long hair falling over his eyes.  
  
The door to the Great Hall opened, and the Golden Trio walked in- Potter, Weasley, and Granger. 'Oh great, a nice way to ruin my day' he thought. He slowly put down his coffee mug, his warm fingers lingering around the edges. He stared slowly around the Hall at the various students. Out of all the people, his eyes were stuck on Granger- he could tell that she was probably just dying to ask him some more questions. Perhaps he would actually dig a little deeper into his past. 'Just to get her of your back, Sev' he thought, trying to reassure himself.  
  
"Soup, Severus?" Albus asked suddenly, offering him a large bowl, filled with thick, orange soup. Severus let out a small grunt, possibly the only thing he could bother saying in the morning. He nodded, and clasped the bowl in his hands, and slowly spooned out the soup, letting it fall into his mouth. Though hot, it slid down his throat easily. He looked up once more at the Great Hall- and caught the eye of that blasted Granger.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
'Oh God, he's looking at me. What do I do? Look away? No, keep looking- why am I acting like a school girl?' Hermione's heart fluttered, as the horrible truth dawned on her- had she started to fancy her Professor? No, that was ridiculous. She was a smart, sensible girl. Not some ditzy, 'I fancy everyone' kind of girl. She could feel a small blush cross her cheeks. 'Not now- anytime but now'.  
  
"You alright, Hermione?" Harry asked, glancing over at his female friend.  
  
"Mmm-hmm. Soup's hot," she replied, praying it was a good enough excuse. Harry frowned, but left it at that. No way could he guess the truth. She would lose her good reputation.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Good, she had looked away. Severus smiled to himself, and leaned back into his chair. He didn't need some sixteen, hormonal girl gawking at him as if he was the king of Sheba. He leant back in his chair, as he thought about the weekend ahead of him. The anniversary to Louisa's death was just around the corner. He knew he would, as he did every year, visit her gravesite. Oh, God, how he wished how she was still alive. Even if Lucius hated her.  
  
  
  
-"How can you like her?" Lucius snapped, as soon as Louisa had left to go to bed one late Friday night.  
  
"She's nice. Why shouldn't I?" Severus replied, leaning over his Herbology homework. 'Also, I'm madly in love with her' he thought, his heart pounding quickly.  
  
"She's a bloody half-caste! A freak!"  
  
"She's not a freak!" Severus growled, quickly snapping up into a sitting position.  
  
"Right. She's not a proper Slytherin- All Slytherin's are supposed to be pure blooded, and she is only half blooded. A mudblood," Lucius retorted. Severus stared up behind Lucius, where Louisa stood, her eyes wide.  
  
"That's nice, Lucius. Just nice. It's great to know how you think of your peers," she muttered, spinning on her heal, and heading back up to her dorms.  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: So? What do you think? My Muse had really gone, and I was just barely able to finish it. But I pulled through in the end. At least I hope I did. Anyway, can you Please dear God, review! And thanks, Ktie Eiknlng, I'm pretty sure I did okay in the three I had today- I have a huge one tomorrow. Well, anyhoo, please leave a quick review! 


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Harry Potter. So piss off and leave me alone.  
  
A/N: It seems to me that no one is reading this anymore. I feel so depressed. I need a hug.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Hermione Granger paced back and forth in her dorm, her back hunched. She could possibly fancy Snape- she was probably just feeling sorry for him. Yes, that was it- she was only feeling sorry for him. Hermione felt compassion; yet she also felt love.  
  
"No, that's just ridiculous. Snape? That old, greasy haired, potion-brewing cruel Professor? That would be like Harry falling for Pansy!" she said aloud, as she collapsed on her back, and onto her bed. "And seriously- there's nothing attractive about him" she finished, forcing herself to believe it. She slowly sat up, and slid off the bed.  
  
"Well, I better get some work down," she muttered, grabbing her book-bag.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus quickly rushed down the hall, in quick, long strides.  
  
"What's the hurry, Professor?" Draco Malfoy asked, a sly grin on his face. "Is a Gryffindor in trouble?"  
  
"No, Mister Malfoy. I am only heading towards my office," Severus replied, stopping in his tracks.  
  
"Oh. Well, good day," Draco said, a disappointed look on his face. Severus nodded, and was on his way again.  
  
'Bloody Lucius' child- why can't that bloody boy get a life of his own? Stop living off other peoples! That great, big, flea of a child' he thought, his cloak swishing softly along the ground. Various students from different houses jumped out of his way, as he walked with an air of importance. Severus spun around a corner, and trotted downstairs to the dungeons, his hair bouncing almost playfully off his shoulders. An echo seemed to bounce across the walls, like a second set of footprints. He paused, and turned his head.  
  
"Miss Granger, what are you doing here?" he groaned, turning the rest of his body around.  
  
"I, uh, wanted to ask you a few, um, more questions about Louisa Lucas," she explained nervously, swinging her book-bag into a more easy position on her back.  
  
'Be nice to her, Severus. She has no idea what she is getting herself into'. "If you really must, Miss Granger. Follow me".  
  
Severus continued down the stairs, and turned into the Potions Classroom.  
  
"Where should I-" Hermione started. Severus' finger pointed over to a desk opposite his own. Hermione obediently sat down, and searched through her book-bag for a piece of parchment and a quill.  
  
"What do you want to know?" Severus hissed, sitting down at his own desk.  
  
"Well, um," she paused, frowning. Oh, God, why was she here? She could have easily sat in the library, reading about Dark Fairies, or the origin of the Unicorns. "What are you willing to tell?" she finally asked.  
  
Severus sighed, and folded his hands on top of one another, his eyes staring darkly into hers.  
  
Hermione cleared her throat, and searched for an easy question. "What did she like to eat?" she asked. Severus rose an eyebrow, almost in mock humor.  
  
  
  
"She did enjoy Chocolate Yule Logs" he mumbled, leaning over the desk. Hermione quickly scrawled that down. "Do you want to know anything else about her?"  
  
Hermione bit her lip. "Favourite color? Um, animal?" 'Come on, Hermione, get brave!' "Did you ever k-k-kiss her?" she asked quickly.  
  
The silence that filled the room was almost deafening. Hermione's short, quick, almost husky breaths was virtually the almost things that could be heard, apart from Severus' slow, repetitive ones. Was he angry? He didn't seem it.  
  
"Did- did you hear me, Professor?" she asked, after what seemed hour after hour of silence.  
  
"Yes, Miss Granger, I did kiss her," he said. 'Why did she ask me that? That was a very personal question, I should have given her a damn detention!'  
  
"Ah, thank you, I guess," she whispered. Severus pulled out a stack of parchment, and began to mark one. Hermione sat still for a couple of moments, before standing up, and gathered her things.  
  
"Do you mind, Professor, if I come back tomorrow?"  
  
There was a pause.  
  
"If you think it is necessary," he finally replied.  
  
"Thank you" Hermione said, smiling weakly. She quickly scampered out of the room, like a frightened first year. Severus looked up slightly as she walked out. He had tried being nice to her. And it had been hard. How the hell was he going to be nice to her for Merlin knows how long tomorrow?  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"Hey, Louisa," Severus said slowly, rubbing his hands over one another. Louisa looked up at him, her bright eyes gazing at him. The Common Room was empty, except for a scattered few students which were up in their dorms. The fire crackled happily, as spark flew up into the chimney.  
  
"Yes?" She wrapped her arm around his as she wriggled closer to him, her legs curled underneath her as they sat together on the couch.  
  
"I was wondering, well, if you would, um, like to go to the Yule Ball with me," he finished quickly, a red-hot blush creeping over his cheeks.  
  
"Are you serious?" Louisa asked softly, a ghost of a smile crossing her lips. Severus nodded quickly, as he stared at the ground, as if it held all of life's secrets.  
  
"Of course I would!" Louisa cried, burying her face in his neck. A smile crossed his face, as he pushed Louisa onto the couch, and began to kiss her feverishly, his hands running softly through her hair. He could fell her lips opening to allow his tongue in. He almost greedily agreed, his tongue practically searching her mouth.  
  
"Sev!" she suddenly murmured into his ear, her hands pushing him away.  
  
"What?" he asked, breathless. Louisa pointed behind him, and Severus turned around to see Lucius standing at the end of the couch, his arms crossed across his chest, simply glaring at them. Glaring. -  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Wow! My eighth chapter! I never would have imagined it was going to get this far! Even if I haven't received a helluva a lot of reviews compared to some stories, I do appreciate the ones I do receive. So keep reviewing! It does mean a lot to me! And review this chapter. I'm a bit iffy about it.  
  
P.S.: I only have on more exam left on Thursday. Wish me luck! 


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I'm not going to repeat this every chapter. I think you got my point after the first chapter.  
  
A/N: Woot! I got so many reviews for my last chapter! People actually liked my last chapter of crap? Well, woo-hoo for me! Anyway, I only have one more exam, and then I'm free until next year. Woopie! Oh, and Alarun, I'm just used to TEXT format. But thanks for the advice! I'll keep it in mind!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-"Why does Lucius hate me?" Louisa asked, as she and Severus sat down outside, by the lake, one winters night in their fifth year. Louisa rubbed her hands together, and pushed back a strand of her hair away from her face.  
  
"He doesn't hate you. He, well, he just isn't particularly fond of you," Severus tried to explain, as he picked out the dewy grass. His eyes slid over to Louisa, and shifted closer to her. He dropped the blades of grass from his hand, and wrapped an arm around her waist.  
  
"So he hates me?" Louisa said, as she pulled off her shoes off her blistered feet. She had been trying to run from Lucius as he called out random magical curses. Severus had seen her running, and caught her. He had yelled angrily at Lucius, and had almost broken his wand in half.  
  
Severus bit his lip, and let out a sigh. His shoulders drooped, and lets his arm drop from her waist.  
  
"Why are you still friends with him?" Louisa asked, staring up at her best friend, and, you could say, lover.  
  
"I don't know. I just am," Severus sighed once more, trying to avoid her teary gaze. Why was he still friends with him? If Lucius couldn't handle Severus having a romantic relationship with a half-muggle born, he defiantly wasn't the worlds best friend.  
  
"Can we just go inside, please?" Louisa asked, as she pushed herself. Severus nodded.  
  
"Alright," he stood up, and wrapped his arms around her stomach. "You know I love you, right?"  
  
Louisa's cheeks grew bright red. "Really?" she asked, her face staring at the ground.  
  
"Yes, really. You're my girl, Louisa. Remember that"-  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus waited, almost impatiently, for the arrival of Hermione Granger. Was she trying to make a fashionably, or an annoyingly late arrival? As Severus ticked the last of the worksheets, a squeak of the classroom door handle filled the air.  
  
"I'm sorry, Professor, if I seem late. I do have a valid excuse!" Hermione rushed, breathlessly, as she quickly sat down where she had been the day before.  
  
"I do hope so, Miss Granger, as my patience with you is wearing a little thin," The Potions Master muttered, as he shifted the parchment onto the ground.  
  
"Well, I was on my way here, when Professor McGonagall asked me to deliver a message to Professor Sprout, which I did," Hermione began, her knuckles clamped around the edge of the bench.  
  
"Then, after a delivered that message, I ran into Hagrid who wanted me to have some tea with him. And because he is so nice, I accepted immediately When I finally realized what time it was, I quickly began here, and then my book-bag broke, so then I had to go upstairs to grab another one, which was difficult because I carry so many books around! And when I finally put all my books in my bag, I came here," she finished, her head hanging down to her desk.  
  
Severus simply folded his hands over one another, and remained silent. Hermione wriggled nervously, and crossed her legs over one another. She paused before speaking.  
  
"Um, about that question I asked you yesterday. I'm sorry if I sounded rude, Professor"  
  
Severus stood up, and walked around his desk and over to the squirming girl. "Miss Granger, what you did say was extremely rude, and personal, but," he took a deep before continuing. He couldn't believe what he was going to say next. "You have a very inquisitive mind, so I suppose you have a fairly good reason"  
  
A faint smile passed Hermione's lips, and let herself relax into the chair. Severus continued to stand, and folded his arms over his chest.  
  
"So, what are you going to ask? Or are you just going to sit there and try to look pretty?"  
  
"Ah, well let me see," Hermione pulled out a notebook, which she had written a few questions down. A short shaky breath flew through her lips, as she nervously asked the first question. "Um, what- what was Louisa's middle name? Did she have one?" she twitched, suddenly realizing how stupid the question was. At least the hormonal butterflies in her stomach had eased.  
  
The Professor raised an eyebrow, and headed back to his desk. "Middle name? Yes, she did- Felicity," he answered, after a brief thought as he tried to pull back some memories. He politely waited for her next question. Though, secretly, in complete fright. What was she going to ask next?  
  
"Well, um, were her parents Pure Blood? Or Muggle?" Hermione quietly asked. Severus cleared his throat to keep it from cracking.  
  
"She was half and half- Her father was a Wizard, and her mother was a Muggle"  
  
This surprised Hermione. Snape was friends with someone who wasn't even a pure Witch? "But she wasn't a Pure Blood. Didn't that bother you?"  
  
Severus considered this thought, before giving a response. "When you are good friends with someone, Miss Granger, it doesn't matter whether they are Pure Blooded, or Muggle-born. Do you understand me?"  
  
Hermione nodded, and stared down at her parchment. She tapped her quill quickly on the desk, as she coiled up the corner of the parchment. "Did she ever talk about her parents?"  
  
"Rarely. When she did she gave short, one-syllable answers," he murmured softly, as he began to put his attention on a scratch on his desk.  
  
"Oh. Okay, then. Next question, then, I suppose. Did she have any other friends?"  
  
"No, I don't think so," he answered, wishing she would just stand up and leave. "She wasn't the most social person. Actually, she was quiet. I'm not quite sure why she was put in Slytherin- she rarely got angry at anyone," he admitted.  
  
"That's different," she glanced down at her desk. As she looked up once more, and could see Snape's face hanging, his long, black hair covering his eyes. Was he crying?  
  
"Professor Snape?"  
  
Severus' face snapped up. No tear streaks, but his eyes look red.  
  
"Um, are you alright?" Hermione asked, her eyes filled with worry. Severus frowned.  
  
"Yes, I am alright. Do you have anymore questions you want to ask me?"  
  
"Just one. It might be a bit personal, but if you don't mind answering"  
  
"Just ask the bloody question, Miss Granger. I would like you to leave as soon as possible,"  
  
Hermione gasped, before blurting out the question. "Did you two love one another? You don't have to answer, Professor it's just that, well, like you said beforehand, I do have an inquisitive mind, and you seem to talk about her with such a passion, that I just had to know-"  
  
"MISS GRANGER!" Severus bellowed. His voice echoed off the walls, and quickly quieted the jabbering sixth-year. Hermione took a dare.  
  
"Well? I just want an answer," she murmured, her voice as red as a rose hip.  
  
Severus seemed to have a very hard time answering. "We were very close- extremely close, in fact. And," he took a deep breath, while kicking himself underneath his desk. "We, um, did love each other"  
  
Hermione just stared at him. "Um, well, thank you very much. Can I put this in my assignment? Or essay?"  
  
"I would prefer if you didn't, Miss Granger. I just told you something very personal, and hard for me to tell anyone. I didn't especially want to tell it to a Gryffindor"  
  
"I think I understand, Professor. I won't tell anyone. But can I put in the rest?" she asked, flipping through her notes. Severus nodded. He seemed very shaky, and highly-strung.  
  
"Are you sure you are alright? I promise I am not going to tell anyone!"  
  
"Just go, Miss Granger. I want to be alone!"  
  
Hermione nodded, and gathered her things. "Well, I'll see you in tomorrows lesson then," she murmured, sheepishly, as she headed towards the door. Severus simply glanced at her, and then turned his gaze to the back wall. He looked very upset. Hermione felt her heart fill with compassion as she walked out of the doorframe. At least it wasn't filled with crazy, romantic thoughts.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus had to admit he did feel better after answering a few simply questions about Louisa. He felt as if a giant boulder had lifted off his shoulders. He couldn't simply tell Hermione Granger that. That girl could simply work it out for herself. Or, he could give her a helping hand- hint about it perhaps? Either way, Louisa should be happy. He was coming out of his 'sheltered box', as she would say. Maybe Muggle born people were smarter, as much as he hated to admit it.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
She had gone out alive. Hermione let out a large breath of air, and dashed up the steps to the Gryffindor Common Room.  
  
"Password?" the Fat Lady said.  
  
"Sparklers" Hermione replied. The portrait swung open and Hermione jumped in.  
  
"Knight to D-5," Ron murmured. He looked up quickly from his game of Wizard Chess, and spotted Hermione. "Back already?" he asked, as Harry's pawn at struck down.  
  
"Snape was actually fairly nice. He didn't give me a detention, thank goodness" she sat down beside Harry, and watched in horror, as the chess pieces attacked each other in a violently crude way.  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Wow! My longest chapter so far! I'm actually pleased with it, but I don't know how the rest of you will act. It took my ages to write, considering I was trying to study for my Geography and History exam. Eh, I think I deserve a bit of a break. I CAN'T REMEMBER ALL THE ASIAN COUNTRIES! Um, anyway. Please review. Yes. Now I'm just being blunt. I don't expect to receive as many reviews as I did for Chapter 8, but I want a few. Please! I'll be, at least for a while, grateful! And so will my Muse! Spanks-a-lot! 


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Get it? Got it? Good.  
  
A/N: Okay, I've finished all my exams. Hurray! And, since tomorrow is my last day for school this year, I'll be updating more frequently. Maybe two or three chapters a day, it really depends how boring my school holidays are. And thanks to the three people who reviewed Chapter Nine. It was probably the longest one to write so far. Anyway, from now on I'm going to try and make my chapters a bit longer. Just thought you would like to know.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Um, Professor Snape, I have a question," Hermione asked, after her Potions class on Monday afternoon.  
  
"If you must, Miss Granger," Severus replied, sighing.  
  
"Well, I was wondering, how exactly did Louisa die? Was it a medical condition, or, um, was she murdered?" she choked out. Severus paused, a far- away look crossing his face. Hermione shifted her books in her arms, and waited patiently. After a few minutes Hermione cleared her throat.  
  
"Did you here me, Professor?" Hermione asked politely.  
  
"Huh? Oh, you still here?" Severus asked, seeming to be snapped out of a trance. "You should go to your next class"  
  
"But I asked you a question- I was just waiting for an answer. Did you here me ask it?"  
  
"Miss Granger, some things are better left unsaid. And, how Louisa died, is one of those things"  
  
"Oh. I guess I understand. But can I ask you other questions? Later?" Hermione asked softly, as she dug her toe into a crack in the floor.  
  
Severus groaned, and nodded. "If you think it's absolutely necessary, Miss Granger"  
  
"When?"  
  
There was a small pause.  
  
"After dinner, today. Let me get my thoughts together," he murmured, as he ran a hand through his hair. Hermione nodded, and dashed out of the class, her hair bouncing after her like a bubbly cheerleader getting ready for a match.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
'Okay, why the hell did I allow that brat to come back? And so fucking soon!' Severus' thoughts went around, and around, almost making his mind dizzy. They were like a merry-go-round- they continued to spin, and, even when he tried to concentrate on one thought, they were of again, in a tipsy- topsy festival. 'You have to admit, Sev, talking to that bloody sixth-year is making you feel better. Maybe you should tell how Louisa died- who knows, maybe that boulder you've been carrying around for so many blood years might have an enormous impact on you'. Severus stood up, and spun on his heel towards the door. What should he do? A shower, yes, a nice, hot shower to relax him. Another Muggle trait Severus had picked up from Louisa.  
  
'Though it was a very embarrassing way to find out about it,' Severus smiled at the memory, as he threw off his robes, as he swaggered into the bathroom. But quite enjoyable, on his behalf.  
  
-As the Christmas holidays all to quickly came to a close, Severus heard water rushing through the plumbing, and into the girl's bathrooms. With a couple of younger and the one or to older, students in the Common Room, Severus presumed it was Louisa. The dinner bell chimed throughout the Hogwarts Castle, and the students ran out of the Common Room in such a frenzy that the odd chairs was turned over. As Severus was about to rush out, he paused. It was polite to wait for her, after all. But he was oh-so- hungry. He had been having a bit of a, well, smooch, you could say, session with Louisa on the opposite side of the lake and hadn't made it to lunch.  
  
'Maybe I should just tell her dinner is ready,' he thought, heading over to Louisa's dorms. He awkwardly opened the door and peeped in. He could still here the shower running, though, obviously, louder.  
  
"Louisa?" he called, shutting the door behind him. No answer. He walked over to one of the beds, which was, compared to the others, perfect. The bed is made, with no creases, no marks, and no dirty underwear thrown of the pillows. It was obviously Louisa's- she was a perfectionist.  
  
"Louisa?" he called once more, picking up his pace and jogging towards the bathroom door. He slowly pushed it open, and stepped in. Smoke clouded his vision, the steam creating small drops of dew on his arms.  
  
"Severus!" A voice called above the running of the water. Louisa's wet face appeared out of the shower cubicle, her hair sticking to her face. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"The dinner bell rang. I thought, you know, want to eat something," he explained, moving from foot to foot, his face lowered in a bashful expression. Louisa noticed this, a wry smile crossing her pale face.  
  
"Are you embarrassed about my nakedness, Sevvie?" she asked, a smile chuckle coming from her lips.  
  
"Yes! I mean, ah, no!" he said, his face snapping up, as he threw his hands behind his back, trying to hide the fact her had been twisting them around one another. Yet nothing could hide his burning cheeks.  
  
"You are, too!" she cried. "Would you like me to make you less nervous?" her voice had become a sultry purr. Her bare arm sprung from the shower, and motioned him to come closer. Nervously, Severus obeyed, almost as if he was under a spell. Louisa's wet arm slammed down on his shoulder, and pulled him until he was on the edge of the shower, sprays of water spitting at him lightly. He could see all of Louisa's naked body now. Surprisingly, she didn't seem to be worried about it.  
  
Severus twitched, as he crossed his legs around one another. He couldn't help but look as a drop of water fell from her chin, down the valley between her breasts, and fell from her the soft crevice at the top of her legs. Severus' breath came out as a short shudder.  
  
"Are you okay, Sev?" Louisa asked, a worried look crossing her face.  
  
  
  
"No, I'm fine," he reassured her. And, before he knew what he was doing, Severus jumped into the shower. A short squeak of shock came from his love, before it turned into a deep moan as Severus kissed her deeply, his hands sliding down from her collarbone to her breasts. The water from the showerhead soaked through Severus' clothes, causing them to stick to his body, yet that didn't matter to him. Never, in his entire years at Hogwarts, had he thought he would see his one, true love naked. In a shower, with him, his hands sliding up and down her body, nonetheless. -  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus snapped back to reality with such a force, that he slammed his head on the glass panel in the shower.  
  
"Ow, shit," he muttered, twisting the taps off. Hermione Granger was going to be arriving in less then an hour. He stepped slowly out of the shower, a puddle slowly beginning to form underneath him. He picked up a towel, and began to dry himself off. Why did he ask her to come so soon? Midnight would have been a more convenient time. He laughed silently, and pulled on his trousers. Maybe he would let Granger dive deeper into his personal life than leave her splashing vaguely at the surface.  
  
  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Crap chapter, I think, but you don't want to see the one I typed up before this. But you probably don't want to hear what I think; I wanna hear what YOU think. Okay, I just sounded really desperate. But I am! Desperate for bloody reviews. Okay, that just sounded really stupid. I sound stupid. Heh, my spell checker says 'bloody' should be 'bloodies'. Um, you didn't need to know that. Yeah. Reviewreviewreviewreviewreview!!! 


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: "Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who owns the Harry Potter books, each one, all?" The Mirror laughed, and gave a grunt- "It isn't you, you ugly cunt!"  
  
A/N: Okay, school is officially over. No need to get excited. I'm not going to jump around like a cheerleader. Bad back, you know. Heh. Anyway, now that school is over, I'm going to try to be happy, not my cynical, bitchy self. Hmmm. Anyway, I'll try to make this chapter long. Everyone wants my chapters to be longer. So I'll try. Be happy. I'm in a good mood for once. Actually, if I were you, I would run. Run far away. I may try to hug you.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Professor Snape, do you ever think of Louisa?" Hermione asked, as she tried to sit in a formal position.  
  
"Sometimes. Occasionally," Severus replied, feeling uncomfortable.  
  
"When? I mean, what times?" Hermione questioned, scrawling down a few notes.  
  
"Do I have to answer that question?" Her Professor answered.  
  
"Well, no, I was just curious"  
  
There was a pause, before Severus replied. "Different times of the day. Most of the time, though, is when I have to sit here with a class full of mindless students, who don't know the difference between the eye of an owl and gecko"  
  
Hermione was a little surprised at this. Snape didn't seem the kind to daydream, especially in class of 'mindless students' whom he could take points off their houses.  
  
"Don't look so surprised, Miss Granger, I'm sure you let your mind go walkabout too"  
  
Hermione blushed. She did sometimes let her mind drift off. But this was a teacher. A teacher was supposed to pay attention. Not let their mind drift into different places, times, memories. Severus stared down at her from his desk, his hands folded on top of one another in a superior manner.  
  
"Do you mind me asking you questions, Professor? I mean, I don't want to be a nuisance," Hermione asked softly, suddenly feeling a little bit cautious.  
  
  
  
"Sometimes they do becoming a little personal, Miss Granger. But, I'm guessing there is no way to avoid them. So, I answer them in hope that you will finally stop asking them,"  
  
"Oh. Well, I'll stop, I just want a good mark" she explained bashfully.  
  
"Why am I not surprised, Miss Granger?" Severus murmured quietly. Hermione bit her lip, and began to draw squiggles on the edge of her parchment. A thought crossed her mind.  
  
"Professor, why don't you ever talk about Louisa's death?" she asked. She prepared for an outburst.  
  
"Some things I talk about, and some things I don't. Louisa's death is one of those things I don't talk about," he said.  
  
"But wouldn't it help if you spoke about it? Let your emotions out?"  
  
"No"  
  
"Sometimes it helps to talk about things. You seem to keep an awful lot bottled up inside," she tried to explain, suddenly dying to know his entire past.  
  
"I don't keep a lot 'bottled up inside', Miss Granger. Everyone must have his or her secrets, including myself. And, I'm guessing you have some secrets you would not like me to know. Am I right, Miss Granger?" he asked, his eyebrows raised in an almost comical way. Hermione nodded slowly. She had many secrets, some not even Harry or Ron knew. She slowly lowered her head to the desk, and pushed herself out of her chair. She paused, and slowly spoke.  
  
"Professor, the Yule Ball is coming up," she began, avoiding his glaring gaze. "And it's being held on the twenty-forth. Well, isn't that the date of Louisa's death?"  
  
There was a long pause. Snape seemed to be having quite a difficult time coming up with an answer.  
  
"Yes," he finally managed. "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Well, I was wondering where you were going to go? The Yule Ball, or Louisa's Gravesite? Because, you told me she was buried at Hogwarts"  
  
"I don't know. I haven't decided yet"  
  
"Well," she began. 'Here comes the hard part, Hermione' she thought. "If you are going to Louisa's Gravesite, can I come?"  
  
Severus seemed to be in shock. "Why? It's not very interesting. I only go there because she was my friend-"  
  
"And girlfriend"  
  
"-And girlfriend, Miss Granger. I don't know whether you would like to see where she was buried. It hurts me when I think about it"  
  
"Is it that bad?"  
  
Severus shrugged. "It depends how you think about it"  
  
"Well, if you do decide to go to her Gravesite, just ask me to come" she murmured, gathering her things, and walking out of the door.  
  
'Merlin, now she wants to see where Louisa was buried? Crap'  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Severus woke up the next day; his hair mattered around his face. He had a bad sleep the night before. Why does Hermione have to keep bringing up Louisa? Hermione didn't know anything about her. Sure, she might know a few things, but she didn't know everything.  
  
Severus slowly rolled out of his bed, and onto the ground.  
  
"Ow, crap," he pulled himself off the floor, and untangled the blankets from his feet. He stood up and ran a hand through his messy hair. He had a rather 'nice' dream- no memory- the night before.  
  
  
  
-"Sev?" Louisa asked softly during a History of Magic Lesson. Their Professor was sitting down at his desk, marking the classes pile of essays they had just written.  
  
"Yes?" he replied, clearing his desk.  
  
"Do- do you ever think about sex?"  
  
Severus was shocked. She had been naked in front of him, seduced him, and made him sexually frustrated, but never had he thought about her thinking about sex. "Sex with you, or sex in general?" he finally managed to croak.  
  
"Both. Either. Just sex," Louisa said, her hand resting on his thigh. Severus swallowed hard, as he tried to keep himself down, as her hand trailed further.  
  
"Well, I don't know. I never really thought about it, I guess,"  
  
"You've never thought about it? I have," she murmured, her hand coming to rest in between his legs. Severus had a hard time swallowing, his legs having the urge to shut, and trap her hand in between them. He also had an urge to fucking have sex with her that very moment.  
  
"Sometimes. But I never thought you did," he admitted, finding himself growing hard. "Aren't- aren't you a virgin?"  
  
Louisa smiled. "I'm hoping I soon won't be"  
  
"Oh. Can you- can you move your hand," he asked quickly.  
  
"Where? Here?" she murmured, slipping her hand into the hem of his pants.  
  
"Louisa? Mister Happy is getting excited!" he hissed into her ear. His tongue gently scrapped against the edge of it, as her fingers clasped around the edge of his boxers.  
  
"Well, we can't just have sex here, can we?"  
  
Severus shook his head. "N-no"  
  
Louisa grinned. "Soon, then"  
  
Severus leaned over to give Louisa a small kiss, when he felt a tap on his back.  
  
"Severus?" he heard a voice hiss. Louisa's hand was quickly out of his pants and back in her lap.  
  
"What is it Lucius?" Severus groaned.  
  
"Nothing. Just thought I saw your Mudblood-girlfriends hand down your pants" he smirked, turning back to his desk. Severus felt a blood-red blush crossing his face.  
  
"Do you still want to?" Louisa asked, squirming in her seat. Severus paused before quickly nodding.  
  
Their Professor suddenly stood up, and handed out their essays. Severus had no idea what was going to happen that night. He wasn't even quite sure where it would happen. -  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
As Hermione sat in front of her mirror on one of the rare occasions where she actually tried to smooth her hair, a random though crossed her mind. Maybe it wasn't completely random, but it was still random for her. What was she going to wear to the Yule Ball? Was she even going to go? Nobody had asked her, but unlike anyone knew- she did want to go. Ron had asked Lavender, and Harry had managed to ask Cho. But nobody had asked Hermione. Maybe she could convince Snape to go to Louisa's Gravesite. It couldn't be in a horrible place- Dumbledore wouldn't allow. 'Unless he didn't know when she died, and where she was' Hermione thought in horror, dropping the brush she held in her hand, onto the ground with a dull thud.  
  
  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: So, what do you think? Like all my other chapters, I have one word: Crap. I love that word. It has so many different meanings. Anyway, did you like it? Or did you hate it? Maybe I should think my writing is a little better then I think it is.  
  
Anyway, I've also thought about the end of this story. Right down to the last sentence. I think too much. My head hurts. I'm going to lie down. Just bloody review. Um, please? 


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: Check the other eleven chapters prior to this one. You should get at least a vague idea of who owns Harry Potter, and who doesn't.  
  
A/N: Well, no updates right now. Just that I look really crap. And me feet hurt. I guess that gives me a good reason to stay on the computer. Yay! Honestly, I'm a big freak at school. And since I live so far away from the few friends I have, I don't have much of a social life. And I'm too lazy to get a job. So the computer is my friend. Yes. Friend. Just read the bloody chapter.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
-"Lucius, what do you want?" Severus groaned late on night, while in his seventh year. He had been having a peaceful sleep, when his so-called friend had woken him up.  
  
"Nothing, why? Can't I just talk to my friend?" Lucius asked.  
  
"You're not my friend," Severus grumbled, and rolled on to his side away from Lucius.  
  
Lucius laughed, and shook his head.  
  
"Shush, you'll wake up everyone else" Severus muttered.  
  
"Nah, they all sleep like logs. Anyway, I have a question about you and Louisa,"  
  
"What is it?" Severus asked, throwing his pillow on top of his head.  
  
"Have you two ever had sex?"  
  
"That's a personal question, Lucius," Severus replied.  
  
"Not really. I mean, everyone has had sex in his or her seventh year. Unless you're still a virgin" Lucius mocked.  
  
"Am not!" Severus cried, sitting up.  
  
"So you and Louisa have had sex?"  
  
Severus paused. "Yes" he finally croaked.  
  
"How many times?"  
  
"I'm not going to tell you that!"  
  
Lucius smirked. "Go on. I'm not going to tell anyone!"  
  
"But I'm not going to gossip about Louisa. She's my girlfriend. You'll just blab about it to everyone!"  
  
"Just give me a vague idea"  
  
"No!" Severus mumbled, lying back down.  
  
"More then once?"  
  
"Shut up!"  
  
"Twice?"  
  
"What do I have to do to make you piss off?"  
  
"Just tell me how many times you and Louisa have had sex"  
  
There was a pause. "Twice. But tell anyone and I swear you'll be fed to the squid"  
  
Severus felt Lucius get off his bed, and back to his own. Thank goodness. He didn't want to talk about his love life, or sex life, to anyone. -  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
December twenty-second- The Yule Ball was only two days away, as was Louisa's anniversary. Where was Severus going to go? The teachers were supposed to go to the Where was Severus going to go? The teachers were supposed to go to the Yule Ball, but it was only right if Severus also went to Louisa's grave.  
  
Severus paced around his room, as he waited for the breakfast bell to ring. He could attend both, but he wasn't sure whether he could make both. The students had lessons in the morning, and at night was the Yule Ball.  
  
"Oh, for God's sake, man. You loved her. Visit her bloody grave, and forget the Yule Ball! They'll survive without you!" he hissed to himself. Should he invite that bloody Granger? He sighed, and walked out of his bedroom and into the classroom- where Hermione was standing.  
  
"Miss Granger, what are you doing here?" he bellowed.  
  
"I- I- I just thought you would like to know I wrote up my assignment. I don't need to ask you anymore questions,"  
  
"No need to tell me that. You could have simply stopped," Severus muttered.  
  
"Well, I wanted to be polite," Hermione explained, shrugging her book-bag back on her shoulder.  
  
Severus let out a sigh, and shifted his weight. "Is there anything else you want to say?"  
  
"Well, just one. What are you going to do with the Yule Ball?"  
  
"I've decided to go to Louisa's Grave," he told her.  
  
"Can I come? I'm just curious about where she was buried," she quickly asked, twitching nervously.  
  
"If you must Miss Granger. But aren't you going to the Yule Ball with all the other pathetic students?"  
  
Hermione bashfully shook her head. "Nobody asked me"  
  
A small compassionate look seemed to cross the Potion's Masters face, but quickly disappeared.  
  
"Well, I guess since you have nothing better to do," he drifted off, a new look of annoyance crossing his face.  
  
"Where should I meet you, then?"  
  
"Here. If you want," he muttered shortly.  
  
"What time?" Hermione asked, her feet tapping softly on the ground.  
  
"Any. Just come"  
  
The breakfast bell rang, on Hermione dashed for the door. "Well, thank you for allowing me to come, Professor" she said, a brief, frightened smile crossing her face. Snape just grunted, as she walked out.  
  
"Thank God she finished that blasted assignment. Anymore questions and I would have to throttle her," he murmured, walking out of the classroom. But it would be nice, he had to admit, to have some company when he went to visit Louisa. Even though he often found it difficult, it would be nice to have some company. Even if it was from a Gryffindor.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Hermione skipped down the hall, her book-bag thumping against her back.  
  
"Why are you so happy, mudblood?" Draco Malfoy hissed, appearing behind her.  
  
Hermione spun around, her joyous feeling disappearing. "I can be happy. Unlike you"  
  
Draco snorted. "You look like you just had a good shag. Or about to get one!" he muttered. A blush crossed her cheeks.  
  
"I don't need a shag to be happy. I might just be having a good day, Malfoy"  
  
"Whatever, Granger, you probably will never share the same bed with someone, anyway!"  
  
This time Hermione snorted. "Just piss off, Malfoy. I'm not going to waste my time talking to you!" And with that final comment, Hermione turned on her heel and walked away.  
  
  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: I know, the shortest chapter I've written. But I honestly couldn't be bothered writing anymore than this. By the way, when I finally finish this story, what do you think I should do? Do you think I should write a sequel? Or not? I just want some feedback. Review, pweese! 


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: Blah. I don't own Harry Potter. So there.  
  
A/N: Okay, I'm thinking right now that there is only going to be two more chapters- this one, and Chapter 14. Please don't kill me. It's the fact of life. This story can't go on forever. Anyway, if I can be bothered, I'll create a sequel. Only if more people tell me to. Uh-huh. Just read.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Only one more day to go. Severus was already feeling sad. Why did she have to go? Why couldn't she still be here, her face in a bright smile, her arms wrapped around his waist, him telling her how much he loved her. He would have been a different man- hell; he wouldn't have even have followed Voldemort. But she had gone. And there was nothing he could do about.  
  
As he stalked the corridors, late that evening, the day before the Yule Ball, thoughts flew in and out of his mind. Why had he let that Granger brat question him? And even go to Louisa's grave? He could have easily bitten her head off, and given her a detention. He should have! But Louisa wouldn't have allowed it. She would have simply answered her questions happily.  
  
'If she was so nice, why was she put in Slytherin?' Severus thought, keeping an eye out for students who were out of bed after curfew- especially Potter and his group of brown-nosing nitwits. He turned around a corner, his hands deep in his robe pockets. Almost not realizing, he pulled out the only photo of Louisa he had. The edges were worn, and the photo of her was faded, yet she was still there, smiling like the cat that had gotten into the cream. He felt a rare smile cross his cheeks, as his fingers ran down the side of the photograph. Merlin, how bad he wanted her to come back. A tear slid down his cheek, and landed on the ground.  
  
He heard a rustle of robes swishing, and looked up.  
  
"Albus! I didn't see you there!" he yelped. He sniffed, and brushed away a tear. Albus glanced down at the photo that Severus held in his hands.  
  
"Severus, why did you never tell me where she died?" Albus asked, his voice full of so much kindness, Severus had the urge to slap him.  
  
"I didn't think I needed to. When you're dead, you're dead Albus," he murmured, slipping the photo back into his pocket.  
  
"Did you bury her?"  
  
Severus paused. What should he tell the old man? The truth, or lie? A lie would be easier, yes, but, by the way he was staring into his eyes, he knew the truth would be the only way out of it.  
  
"No. I didn't" he muttered, walking off.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Hermione rolled around in her bed. Pavarti was sitting on Lavender's bed. The two were gossiping about the Yule Ball- their dates, their dress robes, and Merlin knows what else. But, suddenly, the topic was thrown in Hermione's direction.  
  
"Hermiiii-oneeee!" Lavender sung, standing up.  
  
"What?" Hermione groaned, rolling onto her stomach.  
  
"Come chat with us!"  
  
"No. Let me sleep," she grumbled. Lavender began to tug at her sleeve of her pajamas, and Hermione knew there was no way around it. Slowly, she pulled herself out of the bed, and climbed into Lavender's. Parvarti giggled, as she sat into a more comfortable position.  
  
"So who's your date for the Yule Ball?" she giggled once more.  
  
"I'm not going," Hermione grumbled, wishing she was back in her own bed.  
  
"You're not going?" Lavender questioned.  
  
"No. I don't have to. I have other plans," she muttered, letting out a yawn.  
  
"Like what?" Parvarti asked.  
  
Oh, dear, what was she going to say? Lie? Yes, lie- that was what she should do. But say what? They were waiting for an answer. 'Be brave, girl! Tell the truth!' she yelled to herself. She took a deep breath before replying.  
  
"I'm going somewhere with Snape," she said, her heart beating a thousand times a minute.  
  
"Professor Snape?" Lavender cried in horror.  
  
"Yes, I do believe there is only one Snape at Hogwarts" Hermione snapped.  
  
"Where are you going?" Parvarti asked.  
  
"To his bed I bet!" Lavender snickered.  
  
"I doubt that, Lavender. Professor Snape may not be the friendliest person in the world, but he is better company then you two cows!" she growled. She headed back to her own bed, a scowl on her face.  
  
Had she just stuck up for Snape? The cruel, Gryffindor-hating, Potions Master? Well, after hearing his story, she did hold a little compassion for him. It was only right. Hermione pulled the blanket up over her head and snuggled down, trying to get comfy. Lavender and Pavarti began talking about the Yule Ball again; seeming to have forgotten about Hermione's little act. Hermione couldn't help but smile as she thought about seeing where Louisa's grave was. It would most likely be covered in flowers, with a freshly polished tombstone, and a soft teddy bear leaning on it, Hermione imagined, her eyes shut slightly, if it was true how much Snape loved Louisa. But Snape didn't seem to be the type to be into flowers, and stuffed toys. But, maybe when he was in love, he was into romantic things.  
  
'It's possible' Hermione thought, pulling the blanket a little lower. She heard the clock chime twelve downstairs, in the main Common Room. "Sleep time," she murmured tell herself, yawning. She closed her eyes, as the comfort of the blanket surrounded her.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
-Severus pulled Louisa into his lap, as they sat, facing the lake, the sun setting over the horizon. Christmas was barely a week away, and the festivities had gotten to everyone. Severus buried his face into his lover's neck, planting small, feathery kisses down her shoulder. He heard a content sigh from Louisa as he pulled away slowly.  
  
"Louisa, where do you see yourself in five years?" Severus asked, his fingers entwined in hers. Louisa gazed out over the lake, as she thought of her answer. Severus leaned back against the tree trunk, pulling her with him.  
  
"Hopefully with you," she murmured, the sun reflecting off her face as the sky turned a soft pink. Severus grinned broadly.  
  
"You're sweet," he said, resting his chin on her shoulder. He heard Louisa giggle, and he couldn't help but laugh a little too. Severus shut his eyes contently, and let out a small sigh. "I love you so much," he whispered into her ear.  
  
"I love you more," she whispered back.  
  
"Not possible"-  
  
  
  
TBC  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Bit fluffy at the end. But I thought I should put it in. Like it? Actually, I'm a little pleased with this one. I like the end, even though it was a little bit difficult to write. I'm not really a fluffy person, but I have my moments. Actually, that bit reminds me of marshmallows. Especially pink ones. Nummy. Anyhoo, please review. Only one chapter to go, and then it's finished! WOO-HOO! 


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: Io non possedere le Harry Potter. WOO-HOO! I said it in Italian!  
  
A/N: Well, here's the last chapter. I'm actually quite excited about writing this. As stupid as it sounds. I've decided to write a sequel. SPIN- OFF! Heh. Just because I live to please. Ew, that sounds wrong. By the way, I know I have fairly low self-esteem. But I set my goals only so far. If I set them to high, and I fail, I'll break a leg. If I set them low, and fail, I'll only sprain an ankle. Get what I mean?  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Tears ran freely down Severus' face early in the morning of Christmas Eve, as he pulled on his robes. He knew he couldn't live his room in the state he was in- a teary, snotty mess.  
  
'Pull yourself together, man! You need to learn to have some self-control!' a voice inside his head yelled. He brushed away the tears with the back of his hand, and tried to make himself look at least half-decent. As he ran a comb through his hair, he collapsed lightly on the floor. The tears were unstoppable now- flowing fast freely. He felt like a five-year-old boy who had lost his mother in a shopping center. Instead, he was a thirty-seven- year-old man who had lost the only person he loved when he was seventeen. If any could see him like this, they would probably laugh in his face. All he needed now was someone who could understand. No one here could give him the counseling he needed. Deep down he wanted a hug, to be held and caressed lovingly. But no one in the Hogwarts Castle would do that for Severus, the sneering Potions Master.  
  
He pulled himself off the ground, and wiped his face. All he had to do was get through the day, and then he could cry all he wanted. 'But that bloody Granger has to come along too' he thought in annoyance. But maybe she would be some help- listen to him. Perhap he would let himself cry. The breakfast bell rang, and Severus groaned inwardly as he managed to pull himself out of his bedroom. There, he had gone that far. All he had to do was find his way to the Great Hall, eat breakfast, and hopefully he would be feeling better.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
The Teacher's Table was exceptionally quiet compared to the rest of the tables in the Great Hall. He didn't want the faculty to feel sorry for him. Why couldn't they just go along with their happy lives and leave him in peace? They were all throwing him compassionate looks. He didn't want that. He wanted them all to leave him alone. Hell, Granger was better company then them. At least she listened. Or tried to. He was almost looking forward to her accompanying him to Louisa's Grave. He wouldn't admit it to her. He had to keep up his air of importance. Not turn into a shriveling, crying baby in front of the whole school. But twenty years ago he had.  
  
'Don't cry, Severus, don't cry. Crying symbolizes weakness. Oh, shit, what am I saying? You loved her God damn it' he fought with himself. But he couldn't cry now. No, he had to simply finish his breakfast, and get ready for class. Crying could come later. Much later.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
"I'm surprised Snape hasn't started to cry yet," Harry commented, as he added some bat wings to his death-stopper potion.  
  
"You have to think about it- I mean, how would you react if you saw Snape cry?" Hermione asked, mixing her potion.  
  
"I would think he had gone insane!" Ron jeered, staring down at his swirling, purple liquid.  
  
"I wasn't asking you. Harry?"  
  
"I don't know. Scared, maybe? Mainly worried," Harry replied.  
  
"Yes. That's right. Also, he was to keep up his image of a careless, cruel image. That would totally be wrecked if he broke down and cried," Hermione said, knowingly. She glanced up at her Professor. His hair was covering his face, though she could see his was inches from tears.  
  
"Poor Snape," she murmured quietly. Ron simply glared at her.  
  
"He's Snape. You said it yourself. He's careless!"  
  
"He also has feelings, Ron Weasley. Whether you believe it or not!" she hissed, trying to keep her voice low.  
  
"Okay, okay! No need to get snappy!" Ron muttered, his face in one, big scowl.  
  
Hermione waited for her potion to simmer as she threw in a pair of owl eyes. Her potion turned a murky blue, as she watched it bubble. Hermione, herself, felt like crying. Even though she didn't know how Louisa died, she still felt sorry for her. And Snape. She felt running up and giving him a hug, although she knew he would give her a detention. It was almost like indecent contact with a teacher, although she could see nothing indecent about it.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
As the class walked out of the classroom, Hermione hung around behind.  
  
"Miss Granger, class is over," Professor Snape murmured, almost glad she had stayed behind.  
  
"Are you sure you're alright, Professor?" she asked.  
  
  
  
"Yes," he answered quickly, too quickly.  
  
  
  
"Well, if you don't want me to come with you tonight, I won't" she muttered.  
  
  
  
"I would actually like you to come. It would be nice for a change," he admitted. A brief smile crossed Hermione's face.  
  
"Alright Professor. I'll come," she said softly, dashing out of the classroom.  
  
Severus let out a small grin, the first of the day. It wasn't so bad having Granger around.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
As everyone in the Gryffindor Common Room wandered around in their dress robes, after dinner, Hermione remained in her normal school robes.  
  
"I can't believe you don't have a bed, 'Mione," Ron commented, as she read her Herbology book.  
  
"I'm not. I'm quite happy about not going," she said, half truthfully, half lying. She would have looked to go, yet she was happy about seeing Louisa's grave.  
  
"Fine. But we'll tell you lots of stories when we get back then," Harry said, bouncing from foot to foot. He was quite excited about getting a date with Cho.  
  
"Harry, sit down. You're going to hurt someone, or worse, yourself!" Hermione said, shaking her head. Harry did as he was told, but that didn't stop him from fidgeting.  
  
"Look, I better be going," Hermione sighed, after a few minuets.  
  
"Alright. Have, well, a good time. I guess,' Harry said, stuck for words. Ron simply grunted, as she pushed open the portrait, and stepped outside into the corridor.  
  
As Hermione walked slowly down the stairs that lead into the dungeons, she could see a small sliver of light shining from the Potions Classroom. She slowly pushed open the door, and stepped in. The light was coming from Snape's private office. On his desk was a small bouquet of white roses. Hermione slowly walked over to them and ran her finger over their delicate petals.  
  
"Miss Granger!" Snape cried as he walked out of his office. His eyes were blotchy, obviously from crying.  
  
"Um, well everyone was going to leave for the Yule Ball, so I decided to come," she explained. A small sigh came from her teacher, as he grabbed the roses off his desk.  
  
"Come along then," he muttered, turning to the door. Hermione followed him like a lost puppy. As the wandered down the hallway that headed outside, Hermione sensed she better not say anything, unless she was spoken to. She felt like a child back in the 18th Century- Speak only when you're spoken to.  
  
Snape finally stopped walking as they reached the lake. Hermione glanced around. There was no tombstone, no flowers, just damp grass.  
  
"Why are we stopping?" she asked softly. She was answered by a choked sigh.  
  
"Did Louisa drown?" she asked, just as soft as her previous question.  
  
"No," he whispered.  
  
"How, then?"  
  
Snape sighed, as his fingers ran across the roses, before he began to speak.  
  
  
  
-"Hey, does anyone want to play some Quidditch?" Lucius asked, standing in front of Louisa and Severus, as they sat, talking in the Slytherin Common Room. It was Christmas Eve, and the two were talking about what they were going to do for Christmas.  
  
"Who else is playing?" Severus asked.  
  
"Just thought it would be a little game by ourselves. The field's empty, so it should be fun," Lucius said, grinning.  
  
"I don't like heights," Louisa murmured.  
  
"Well you don't have to play. How about you, Severus?"  
  
Severus bit his lip, before agreeing.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
Louisa watched silently, as Lucius and Severus played a one-on-one game of Quidditch high in the air. There were no Bludgers flying around, which Lousia was very happy about, as she had developed a rather large fear of them.  
  
As the game came to a close, Louisa got up to leave. Severus landed slowly on the ground, Lucius behind him.  
  
"We better put everything away," Severus said, picking up his broomstick. Louisa grabbed the large, wooden Quidditch crate where the balls were strapped down. Lucius, surprisingly, picked up the other side. Though suspicious, Severus didn't think anything about it.  
  
As they neared the Quidditch shed, Lucius let out a groan.  
  
"What's wrong?" Severus asked, as he opened the door.  
  
"I left my broom back on the field. Can you go back and get it?"  
  
"I will," Louisa spoke up.  
  
"Nah, don't worry Louisa, I will," Severus said, laying his broom on the ground. He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before running off to the Quidditch field. Louisa slowly put down the wooden crate, and walking over to the lake which was only a few meters away. She heard a small squeak, and turned around, where Lucius was crouching over a struggling Bludger that was squirming on the ground.  
  
"Hey, Louisa?" Lucius asked. "How hard do you think the force would be for someone to be killed by one of these.  
  
Louisa shrugged; suddenly wishing Severus would hurry up.  
  
"Come on, guess,"  
  
"I don't really know. I never thought about it," she murmured. Lucius picked up the Bludger, his fingers holding onto it tightly.  
  
  
  
"What are you doing?" Louisa asked softly, seeing Severus jogging back to the shed in the distance.  
  
"Scared?" Lucius hissed dangerously.  
  
"Severus is coming back. He's almost here," she murmured quietly, praying for a distraction.  
  
"Good. He can see his sweet Mudblood girlfriend die," And with that final comment, Lucius slammed the Bludger over her head. Severus dropped the broom to the ground, and ran the last hundred or so meters. Deep, red blood poured freely from Louisa's cracked skull as she sunk to her knees.  
  
"What the fuck did you do?!" Severus screeched, his face a pale white. He dropped down onto the ground, and put a hand over the open wound.  
  
"Smashed a bludger on her head,' Lucius muttered simply, placing it back in the crate.  
  
"You bastard!" Severus yelled, as he felt Louisa's cold hand. Lucius simply laughed as he dragged the crate into the shed. How could he laugh like that? As if he was talking about the weather? Severus rolled Louisa onto her back, blood staining the grass. His hand grasped hers, her fingers clasping his loosely.  
  
"Louisa?" he murmured quietly, tears falling from his eyes. A groan came from her; her eyes squeezed shut in pain.  
  
"How are you feeling?" he asked in a murmur, as her breaths becoming shorter and less frequent.  
  
"My head hurts," she whispered, opening one eye.  
  
"Shh, you'll be okay," he said, trying to reassure himself more then her.  
  
"Good," she murmured, as she closed her eyes. Her fingers finally fell from his, as the horrible truth dawned on him. He felt Lucius standing behind him, his eyes staring at the back of his head.  
  
"She's dead," Severus muttered.  
  
"She deserved to go," Lucius hissed, walking around Severus, and picking up Louisa's dead body.  
  
"What are you doing?" Severus asked, tears continuing to fall.  
  
"Throwing her in the lake. You can't expect us to tell the teachers, do you?"  
  
"They'll find out! I'll tell them!" Severus screeched, standing up.  
  
"So? I'm still throwing her in the lake. You helping me or not?"  
  
Severus shook his head, and stared down at Louisa's pale face one last time, before Lucius pulled her along the ground and into the water, before dropping her, the tide of the lake slowly pulling her away from the shore. -  
  
  
  
Hermione stood in numb horror, as she glanced from the Quidditch shed to the lake.  
  
"I didn't want to tell you," Snape muttered, throwing the roses into the water.  
  
"It's horrible," Hermione murmured quietly, watching the tide brush at her feet. She looked up at the Potions Master as a tiny tear feel down his cheek. He caught her looking at him, and quickly brushed away the tear.  
  
"You can cry. I won't tell anyone," Hermione told him.  
  
"No. I've learnt to control my emotions while around people. It would be to strange,"  
  
"Okay,"  
  
There was a slight pause, before Snape spoke up once more.  
  
"You look like her. Louisa, I mean,"  
  
"Do I?"  
  
"Slightly. Same hair. Face shape. Though her eyes were a deep green,"  
  
Hermione nodded and glanced into the murky green waters of the lake. Snape did the same, and put a hand on her shoulder.  
  
"I still miss her. Wonder what she'd be doing if she was still alive," Snape said softly, staring back at his reflection. Out of the corner of his eye, he could swear he could see Louisa staring back at him. Or maybe it was just Hermione's reflection.  
  
  
  
The End.  
  
  
  
***  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Just a small dedication:  
  
This is dedicated to the Life and Love of Lindy Doan.  
  
5 June, 1987- 29 August 2002  
  
May you live forever in the souls of everyone's life you touched so deeply. We shall never forget your lovely smile, and your friendly manner to everyone. We will never forget you. 


End file.
